It's official. I filled out the form on the Bob Potts Marathon website a few minutes ago. I won't be running it this year.
My thoughts these past ten days or so have been that if I could run this coming Sunday (two weeks before race day) and run long (say 15-18 miles) and well (a long shot given two weeks off but worth a try) then I'd keep my date with Bob Potts. However, I won't even get to find out the results of today's testing until sometime into next week. And even assuming the results tell the doc something then we have to come up with a plan to work with whatever that is. So the spring marathon plan is busted. As I said to Dave after I told him the news, "They better find something wrong. Fixable, mind you, but wrong".
I will likely second guess myself for awhile - at least until the doctor gives me some answers I suppose. In 53 years, though, I've learned that my instincts are right more often than they are wrong and my gut (well my heart really) is telling me to sit this one out. Since the episode April 27 that started this detour it's like a switch was flipped. I went from getting these flutters once in a blue moon to everyday. They are most present when I walk for a time or go up the stairs. (Talk about feeling old!) But they also happen now at random odd intervals when I am not exerting any effort at all. The just before sleep ones are extremely un-nerving, btw. So all that considered I think I'm making the right choice.
It could end up being nothing serious and totally manageable. I sincerely hope so anyway. But the answers won't come soon enough for me to be ready for May 26th. I so wanted this marathon to be the one where I did more than just finish. I wanted this to be the one that I finished spent but strong. And that can't happen now. Too much downtime.
It is what it is. A person's just gotta keep smiling and keep moving :)